Subscribe to:
Post Comments (Atom)
Life goes on in this wonderful retirement community. I am surrounded by my loving family and friends. Life is good!
a Dose of Dave (Barry)
Thanksgiving is not merely a time of eating until we are big fat bloated carbohydrate balloons lying motionless on the sofa watching the Detroit Lions while actual gravy oozes from our pores. Thanksgiving is also a time of giving thanks --as the Pilgrims did so many centuries ago --for the fact that the malls are open on Friday. Otherwise we'd have to spend another day cooped up with our loved ones, not to mention toxic levels of leftovers, and the number of domestic drumstick assaults would be even higher than it is.
_______________
Not everybody is comfortable with the idea of eating turkeys, which are, let’s face it, living organisms, like dogs or celery. You may wonder: Is there a more humanitarian option that you can serve for Thanksgiving dinner? There certainly is: tofu, a semi-foodlike substance secreted by soybeans as a defense mechanism. Tofu can be used as a high-protein substitute, as well as a denture adhesive or tile grout. In its natural state, tofu is tasteless and odorless, but if you form it into a turkey-shaped lump, season it well, add gravy, and bake it for two hours in a shallow pan at 350 degrees, you can also use it for minor driveway repairs.
_______________
Not everybody is comfortable with the idea of eating turkeys, which are, let’s face it, living organisms, like dogs or celery. You may wonder: Is there a more humanitarian option that you can serve for Thanksgiving dinner? There certainly is: tofu, a semi-foodlike substance secreted by soybeans as a defense mechanism. Tofu can be used as a high-protein substitute, as well as a denture adhesive or tile grout. In its natural state, tofu is tasteless and odorless, but if you form it into a turkey-shaped lump, season it well, add gravy, and bake it for two hours in a shallow pan at 350 degrees, you can also use it for minor driveway repairs.
Johnna
Johnna is a portmanteau word made from JOHn (that's me) and my late wife DoNNA who is loved and will be missed forever.
9 comments:
This is my reproduction of an actual tent sign that was placed along all of the passageways (halls) at the Naval Ocean Systems Center (NOSC) where I worked for 27 years.
The sign was placed over a freshly-painted, clear, laquer stripe which contained magnetic material. This created an "invisible" magnetic path used to guide the new automated mail carts. It surely created a lot of humor and talk about these improbable, if not confusing signs. I wish now that I had kept one as a souvenir.
Here's my idea: Anyone who has come across an improbable, confusing, or funny sign. Let us know by commenting in this section, where and what were the circumstances and intention of the sign.
The biggest reaction to this sign was: "If its invisible, how do I know if I am or am not stepping on it?!!?"
(and its not just government sign makers that do this kind of thing!)
This doesn't really count, but one of my favorites was a t-shirt Dan had when he was a little guy. We got it a Yellowstone one year. It had a cartoon drawing of a sign in the wilderness that said, "Do not feed the bears." Standing next to it was a big old smiling bear holding a hand-lettered sign, "I am not a bear!"
OK, I'm done.
I will keep my eye out!! Now that it is brought to everyone's attention hopefully we will see and share a lot of these!!!
Barb
I remember that "invisable" line that allowed the mail cart to roam the floors!!! Ah, that was good times, eh pop? (ol' NOSC, .....was fun to work nearby and to stop in for a visit now and then!!!)
Another sign that is confusing on purpose is one that is displayed in many "neighborhood bars" -some of us have seen it, others have not. It reads:
"Free Beer Tomorrow!"
Of course when (or if) you return then next day, the sign still reads "Free Beer Tomorrow!"
Oh, I always thought Free Beer Tomorrow! was a political sign.
You know, like, Free Tibet Today!
Or Free Willy!
Oh, never mind! ;-)
My favorite sign reads:
"Unattended kids will be given 4 shots of espresso and a free puppy."
Post a Comment